Buyer's Remorse

Have you ever bought something on impulse only to wish afterwards that you hadn't? I know I've been guilty of "buyer's remorse" on a number of occasions because truth be told, I'm a recovering impulse-buyer. Thanks to my wife's looks of disapproval, I'm doing much, much better.

There's a great example of buyer's remorse in the scriptures.

"Then all the elders of Israel gathered together and came to Samuel at Ramah, and said to him, 'Look, you are old, and your sons do not walk in your ways. Now make us a king to judge us like all the nations" (1 Samuel 8:5).

The nation of Israel had "suffered" through over four hundred years of disunity (the period of the Judges), and more recently, Samuel's sons, who were judges, had "perverted justice" in the land (vs. 3). At first glance, it appears as if they had a legitimate case; they simply longed for stability. Right?

"But the thing displeased Samuel when they said, 'Give us a king to judge us.' So Samuel prayed to the Lord. And the Lord said to Samuel, 'Heed the voice of the people in all that they say to you; for they have not rejected you, but they have rejected Me, that I should reign over them. According to all the works which they have done since the day that I brought them up out of Egypt, even to this day - with which they have forsaken Me and served other gods - so they are doing to you also. Now therefore, heed their voice. However, you shall solemnly forewarn them, and show them the behavior of the king who will reign over them'" (vs. 6-9).

As you can see, their motives were not as pure as they wanted Samuel to believe. It wasn't an innocent longing for stability. By requesting a king, they were only wanting to be like the pagan nations around them, and in so doing, they were rejecting the reign and rule of God. But God permitted it. If they wanted a king, a king they would receive. But Samuel was to make it very clear to the people that there were many disadvantages to having a king, and he did so in great detail in verses 11-18. They were unaffected by Samuel's warnings, insisted on a king, and ultimately received a king - a man named Saul.

Not long after Saul was appointed king, Samuel addressed the people. His message was one of rebuke and disapproval. Perhaps his words pricked their hearts, or perhaps there was already some buyer's remorse setting in, for we see their response in 1 Samuel 12:19,

"And all the people said to Samuel, 'Pray for your servants to the Lord your God, that we may not die; for we have added to all our sins the evil of asking a king for ourselves."

Samuel really didn't say a whole lot in his message that he hadn't said before, but now that the deal had been finalized, they suddenly felt the need to repent.

Then, of course, over the years, there were many occasions of rebellion and dissatisfaction, but perhaps the greatest display of buyer's remorse is found in 1 Kings 12:4. Granted, this was four kings later (Saul, David, Solomon, and now Rehoboam), but it still illustrates the point. Following Solomon's death, as the people prepared to apoint Rehoboam king, they said to him,

"Your father made our yoke heavy; now therefore, lighten the burdensome service of your father, and his heavy yoke which he put on us, and we will serve you."

Isn't this what Samuel warned the Israelite nation about 120 years earlier? Hadn't he told them that this would happen, that they would be afflicted and burdened by the king who ruled over them? Do you think that the Israelite nation was experiencing some buyer's remorse? I think so.

What's the point of this article? Am I warning against the remorse you may feel if you make an impulsive purchase? No, although we should all make good financial decisions. Am I addressing the buyer's remorse that many feel who voted for Obama for president in 2008? No, although many do feel that way (sorry, I couldn't help myself).

The lesson here is a spiritual one.

There are many people who make the decision to become followers of Christ only to wish afterwards that they hadn't done so. Maybe it is that they are pressured into being baptized by family members or folks at church. Perhaps they witness a friend's conversion and decide that they want to have the same experience. Or maybe they realize that they want to be saved from their sins, but they don't realize till after they are baptized that there is so much required of them (i.e. going to church, studying the Bible, abstaining from immorality, etc). Whatever the case may be, they have a great longing for salvation one minute, but then once they receive it (or soon thereafter), they begin to have buyer's remorse.

"But Jesus said to him, 'No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God'" (Luke 9:62).

The question is: how do we keep this from happening? To put it simply, we need to do what Samuel did with the Israelites; we need to warn prospective converts of the changes they will have to make once they are born again. In other words, we need to help them "count the costs."

"If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple. And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it - lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, 'This man began to build and was not able to finish..." (Luke 14:26-30).

In other words, it's not just about being going through the motions and "getting saved." Baptism is the beginning of a new life, and while I'm not saying that prospective converts must understand ALL that will be required of them, they do need to understand that there will be expectations! This is what Peter was doing to the 3,000 Jews who expressed interest in being baptized in Acts 2:40 when "with many other words he testified and exhorted them..."

Whether it's you, someone you're studying with, or simply someone that has recently been converted (or is wanting to be converted), we need to do everything we can to prevent buyer's remorse. It would be better for someone to consider the costs, the sacrifices and the expectations and to decide against conversion than to "put their hands to the plow and look back."

What are your thoughts on this subject?