The Song of Solomon

I always try to come up with a catchy title for my articles so that more people will choose to read them and hopefully benefit from the message. The title of this article, however, doesn't need any added flair. "The Song of Solomon," perhaps the most bland and straightforward title of any article I've ever written, will garner much attention, I'm sure, because not only is so little ever said about this book of the Bible, it's a book that contains a very unique and awkward message.

I'm not going to waste time in this article reviewing the different views of "The Song of Solomon" nor will I present a verse-by-verse commentary of the book. I'd simply like to offer you three lessons that I glean from this wonderful and sorely-neglected part of Scripture.

First of all, as the first three chapters describe this period of engagement between Solomon (the beloved) and "the Shulamite" (an unnamed woman), we learn that while it can be very difficult for unmarried people to maintain purity, it is very important that they do so. It is very clear that Solomon and the Shulamite were madly in love with each other and physically attracted to each other. And I personally believe based on the language that they struggled to maintain purity before marriage. They desired one another and as they spent time together during their engagement, it was all that they could do to keep those desires at bay. Twice during their engagement, the Shulamite said, "Do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases" (2:7; 3:5), and both statements followed instances of physical contact. 

And yet we know that despite their ongoing struggle, they did not have sex before marriage. Following their wedding (3:11), we find the following graphic language in chapter four...

"A garden enclosed, is my sister, my spouse, a spring shut up, a fountain sealed" (4:12).

"A fountain of gardens, a well of living waters, and streams from Lebanon. Awake, O north wind, and come, o south! Blow upon my garden, that its spices may come out. Let my beloved come to his garden and eat its pleasant fruits" (4:15-16).

In the former verse, the phrase "a garden enclosed" denotes the Shulamite's virginity. However, we learn that as their marriage was consummated, Solomon was the first to enter her garden. Again, the language is graphic and awkward for many in today's culture, but it's so important for us to understand because despite their struggle for purity, they had remained pure and were now about to enjoy one another sexually as God intended, and to glean from that special experience its intended joy and gratification.

Secondly, we learn that sex, in it's proper context, is holy and right. We hear so much about the sins of fornication and adultery that we sometimes view sex itself as dirty. Don't get me wrong, sex outside of marriage is wrong. But in the context of marriage, sex is good. Hebrews 13:4 says, "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge." Sexual intimacy, when enjoyed by a husband and wife, is said to be honorable. And while sex is the means of procreation, The Song of Solomon makes it abundantly clear that sex is also for our enjoyment. It is such a beautiful expression of intimacy and union in the marriage, and the pleasure we derive from it is as much about that intimacy and love as it is about the gratification of sexual desires.

But let me also say this about sex: if you partake of sexual pleasure before and/or outside of the marriage relationship, it will tarnish your view of sexual intimacy once you're married. In other words, if you pollute what God designed to be good and holy, then even when you have the right to it, it will not feel as good and holy as it would have been otherwise. Dear reader, there are consequences for rejecting God's plan, and many marriages have suffered because either the husband or wife (or both) entered marriage with a sexual history that now taints what they have with their spouse.

Finally, "The Song of Solomon" teaches us that once married, husbands and wives must work to maintain a healthy sexual relationship. Of course, we read about the bliss and excitement of their wedding night at the conclusion of chapter four, but in chapter five, we learn that problems arose. Solomon comes to his wife's chambers (5:2), but the Shulamite delayed in letting him in (5:3-4). By the time she opened the door, he was gone (5:5). Distressed, she searches for him and ultimately the matter is cleared up. Isn't it common for husbands and wives to misunderstand one another or to fall prey to a lack of communication that results in similar distress and polarization? Like Solomon and the Shulamite, we must respond to these instances by reconciling.

We also learn in chapter seven that Solomon and the Shulamite refused to let the flame of love be extinguished. While many married couples fall out of what we call "the honeymoon phase" and drift apart, the two characters in this story worked to maintain their intimacy. They remained physically attracted to each other (7:1-5), were creative and inventive in their sexual encounters (7:6-10) and even slipped away together on overnight trips and mini-vacations to keep things fresh and exciting (7:11-13).

How often do we allow our jobs, our obligations and our children suck the life out of our marriage? And yet as difficult as it can be to find the time and even the money, we must make this a priority. For our own spiritual well-being, marital health, personal happiness and even for the benefit of our children (they need parents who are madly in love with each other), we need to work to maintain intimacy.

Of course, so much more could be said about this wonderful book, and if you have questions, please feel free to shoot me a message. But please don't ignore this book. While the message may be awkward for some, "The Song of Solomon" is in the Bible for a reason. God wanted it there, which means that it contains a very important and needful message.