Monday, September 21, 2009

Proverbs & Corporal Punishment

The theme this week will be "Raising Children God's Way." Each day, I will post a new article covering a different aspect of parenting (i.e. discipline, training, teaching, etc). For those of you who are parents, I hope that you especially benefit from this series of articles. If you disagree with anything that I write, please comment below.

As we begin this series of articles, I'd like to first of all emphasize the importance of corporal punishment. Corporal punishment is a fancy way of referring to physical punishment (i.e. spanking). So really, the question is: should we spank our children? We live in a society that is growing increasingly antagonistic towards corporal punishment. Nowadays, many view spanking as mean and cruel. In some places, CPS (Child Protective Services) is alerted when a parent is seen spanking their children...as if the parent is physically abusing them. Some parents have said things like, "I love my child too much to spank them." But is this view consistent with the Bible? No, it is not. Let's consider the following verses from the book of Proverbs...

"He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes." (Prov. 13:24) "Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying." (Prov. 19:18) "Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him." (Prov. 22:15) "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell." (Prov. 23:13-14) "The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame." (Prov. 29:15)

Does the Bible sanction corporal punishment? Not only does the Bible sanction it, but according to these verses, it is recommended and esteemed as the best way to raise your children. (I have heard some parents argue that spanking doesn't work on ALL children, that other methods of discipine are sometimes more efficient. This may be true, but generally speaking, we see that God encourages corporal punishment.)

Let it be understood here in the beginning that there is a HUGE difference between physical punishment (i.e. spanking) and physical abuse. In no way does God sanction abuse. We cannot take these verses in Proverbs to justify the mistreatment and abuse of children. Is that clear enough? Okay, good.

Now, let's return to the verses listed above. What do they mean and how do they relate to our discussion of corporal punishment?

First of all, Proverbs 13:24 says that if we love our children, we will spank them. This one verse deals a death blow to the ones who say, "I love my children too much to spank them. No, according to the Bible, if you love your children you will spank them...and you will spank them often (as the latter part of the verse indicates).

Proverbs 19:18 tells us not to relent from corporal punishment just because the child is crying. I've seen so many parents just give into their children as soon as they start crying and pitching a fit. "Oh, I'm sorry, Mommy shouldn't have done that. I won't do that again." Sure, we should apologize to our children when we are wrong, but don't back down just because they don't like the punishment. When parents begin to grow soft in this regard, their children quickly become disobedient, manipulative crybabies. They will learn that they can get away with anything so long as they pitch a fit at just the right time.

Proverbs 22:15 emphasizes the reason for corporal punishment. Children don't know the difference between right and wrong. If you don't correct a child when he/she is wrong, then how will they learn what is acceptable and unacceptable? That is the reason. Too often, parents punish their children for the wrong reasons (which I'll get into tomorrow), but if we discipline our children God's way, it WILL work.

In this article, we've done two things. We've established the importance as well as the meaning of corporal punishment. Tomorrow, I want to address common mistakes that parents make when disciplining their children.

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